O Christmas Tree

"What is the deal with this tree?!"


 My husband was struggling to get the Christmas tree we had just chopped down into the stand and it just would not cooperate.  That's when we noticed the crazy trunk.  From the base to it's 7 foot tall tip, it was as bent and crooked as it could be.  It's amazing we hadn't noticed it in the field, but all we had looked at was the shape of it's lovely branches.  It took some doing, but Joey finally managed to force the tree into the stand, and was able to adjust it so that it stood perfectly upright. 


As I began to decorate the tree, I studied its trunk more closely.  Somehow with every bend it had managed to correct itself with an upward turn.  In places it appeared to have overcorrected, bending a little too much in the opposite direction.  But nearer the top it had straightened out more and more, so that the angel only had to sit slightly crooked.


As I continued hanging lights and ornaments, I saw similar growth patterns in my own life, and a Bible verse came to mind.  "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." (Jeremiah 29:11)


I recalled how insistent I was as a teenager that I would attend a certain college, and then I didn't get accepted.  So I went somewhere else and wasn't happy, still determined that I would get into my first choice the next year.  Well, guess what?  I didn't.


I did end up transferring, but to a school I had never even considered.  It just kind of fell into place through a series of circumstances.  Once there I loved it, and wished I had been there for my freshman year.  Eventually I discovered my broadcasting major, again something I had never considered and that wasn't even offered at the school that had been my first choice.


Upon graduation, I decided on the cities I would go to in search of a job to launch my career.  I put 1700 miles on my car driving to interviews, only to be rejected time and again.  Finally, to appease my parents I sent my resume to a tv station in a tiny town I never would've considered had I not REALLY needed a job.  Wouldn't you know it was the only place of the dozens I applied that made an offer? So off I went, again determining to bide my time until I could get where I wanted to be.


In the two years I spent at that little tv station I gained valuable experience, learning from people who were good at what they did and were willing to put up with my amateur mistakes and show me the ropes.  And better still, in that tiny town I met the wonderful and amazing above-mentioned man, who, while forcing the above-mentioned tree into its stand caused me to reflect on all this!


Let me get to the point.  You can be sure that all those changes to MY plans came with a lot of tears and anxiety.  After all, I knew exactly what I wanted and had mapped out how and where I was going to get it.  But never once did I ask God about HIS plans for my life, which turned out to be so much better than anything I could've dreamed up.


So back to the tree trunk.  The way I saw them, every bend and twist reminded me of myself running off in my own directions, chasing after my own plans. I've heard it said that we're either growing or we're dying.  Well, it's kind of hard to keep growing sideways.  If that tree had kept growing in a crazy outward direction it eventually would've fallen over.  Every bend required correction in the form of an upward turn. 


As I look back on those events and other plans I made for myself, I realize the frustration and pain experienced when they didn't work out so well was a result of the Lord's correction, setting me back on course with HIS plan, pruning my branches, if you will.  And those are the places I see true and meaningful growth, growth that is upward and stretches heavenward just like the tree, because it's been cultivated by the One who promised to prosper me and give me hope and a future.


I don't live with any regret over past failures.  Rather, I chose to live with resolve to follow Proverbs 3:5-6: "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight."  If I can do that, I know that he will make my life beautiful in his sight, just like my Christmas tree looked to me!

A New Season

"But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light."
(1 Peter 2:9)

We have two beautiful maple trees in our backyard. The only problem is, they are among the last trees in the Spring to get their leaves, and among the first in the Fall to lose them.

For the last couple of weeks, I watched every day as the trees budded. It seemed to take forever for the buds to begin to open and the leaves to very slowly begin to unfold and grow. Then one day, I looked out the window and marveled at how the leaves seemed to have appeared overnight, and the trees suddenly appeared vibrant and alive.

Today I realized that I have been very much like those trees. My world seemed to stop for a little while upon learning in January that I have MS. As I struggled to come to grips with it both physically and emotionally, I felt like I was in some sort of dormant state, a holding pattern if you will.

This morning, when my friend Barbara asked me how I'm doing, I was able to respond that I'm doing really well. I told her that I'm feeling better physically, and that mentally and emotionally I'm no longer in a place where it's constantly occupying my thoughts. I feel really good.

"A couple of months ago," I said, "I wasn't there. It's taken some time to be able to let go of it and say that it is what it is and it's okay."

As I spoke those words to Barbara, I could see the leaves on the maple trees outside my kitchen window blowing in a gentle breeze, and that's when I realized the parallel with my life these last few months. It has taken time and effort, but just as winter has changed to spring and the earth has come back to life, God has brought me through a harsh season as well, and I want to enjoy this life I've been given!

It felt really good to be able to say "I feel really good," and to say it with complete sincerity. It almost caught me by surprise, kind of like the leaves that seemed to have opened overnight. I'm so thankful to God, the one who "called me out of the darkness into his wonderful light."

"The Lord will comfort Zion and will look with compassion on all her ruins; he will make her deserts like Eden, her wastelands like the garden of the Lord. Joy and gladness will be found in her, thanksgiving and the sound of singing." (Isaiah 51:3)